Wednesday, March 28, 2012

You could write a book. "How to Offend Women in 5 Syllables or Less".

This is funny in the movie.

It's not very funny in real life. And sadly, it's pretty accurate for a lot of the male population. And a lot of them don't even realize they're like that.

Bitter is probably the wrong word. I'm not as bad as that. (I don't think, anyway). But some things bother me, even though they shouldn't. Some things hurt my feelings that ought not to matter.

And today, it's this.

Today I read an article by a guy who was trying to explain why some men are royal deuschbags. (Not as an excuse. Just an explanation.)

It didn't change my opinion on guys. Not in the least. But sitting here after the fact, I think I'd rather have not known the whole thought process. Because the guys that I already thought were creepers now seem 50 times worse.

And even though I still know that there are women that are jerks too, and that not all men are disgusting, it's fresh in my mind now. And it's officially ruined broadway for me. Hopefully it's just temporary, though.

Here's what I mean.  

When the girls sing about love in all those musicals, what do they say?

They talk about being loved, and being held close. About having someone care about them, and treat them like no one else does.

What do the guys sing about? Lips, hair, and sparkling in the firelight.

Normally I like this song. But after reading that article, all I could think about it when I heard it was "What else is there?" And it made me sad.

The ugly truth is that, no matter how many times people say "looks don't matter," the fact remains that they do. They matter a great deal.

The mantra, if we said it truthfully, would really be "Looks shouldn't matter. It should be what's on the inside that counts."

That's how life ought to be. And it is, so some extent, and within certain circles. So everything I say here, I qualify with a standing "Lot's of people but not all."

But I ought to know. I've spent the last 9 years watching the dating scene. Watching guys chase the prettiest girls, even when they know nothing about the person inside. Having girls tell me that "if only they knew you, they'd love you as much as we do" only to realize that they aren't going to bother to know me, because there's nothing to catch their attention. Watching the vacant and vacuous get all the dates, just because they're blonde.

I've seen it happen. And that's even here at BYU where the guys are, on average, much less creepy.

Ok, maybe I am a little bitter. But all the same, that really is the way the world works. If you're the type of person that doesn't have so much on the outside, it takes you years longer than everyone else to find someone.

(Side note. No, it's not the being unmarried thing that I'm bitter at. It's the not getting a fair chance, just because I'm not tall, thin, and blonde thing.)

I do honestly wish that the girls were right. That the guys would look inside, and be wowed. But the world isn't like that. And in the mean time, I can't even appreciate the broadway girls who get the guy in the end, because all I keep thinking is "Ugh. The guy always gets the pretty girl. I hate you Cosette."  

So, dear article, thank you for ruining things.

1 comment:

  1. Pres. Kimball said "Even a barn looks better when its painted."